Stumble to the kitchen, opening the door
Praying to god there’s coffee in store
Gatorade, eggs, alka seltzer
Don’t drink too fast , wasn’t there a bouncer

Last night, memories in bit & pieces
Calves aching, dancing never ceases
On the table, dress may have torn
Possibly, I think a bra airborne
Not mine, thank god
Another drunken sod

Hope I didn’t drive, nope my car’s not here
Hey how did I get this cut on my ear
A bruise on my leg, a scrape on my
Ashtray full of cigarettes
Memories coming back I really wish I’d forget.

And where is my car by the way
I just had it washed yesterday
Was my birthday and I went to a party
A few drinks, why’d I have to be a smarty
Pants are missing too
Purse wallet keys, no clue.

Learn my lesson, whatever for
Its great fun we you stay on the floor
Of the bathroom, making friends with john
Wondering where your clothes had gone